More Than Labels: Shawn Mendes, Sexuality, and the Public’s Invasive Curiosity
Last night (October 28), at his For Friends and Family Tour show in Colorado, Shawn Mendes took a moment to address something that’s been shadowing him since the early days of his career: the rumors and public speculation about his sexuality. Before launching into his new unreleased song, The Mountain, Mendes paused a bit to share his thoughts on the matter with the audience, and his words resonated deeply with fans.
The 26-year-old Canadian singer began by acknowledging how people have been questioning his sexuality since he was “really young.” Taking the stage with a sense of vulnerability, he said, “It’s kinda silly because I think sexuality is such a beautifully complex thing, and it’s so hard to just put it into boxes,” reflecting on the way people have often tried to label him. Mendes went on to explain how this scrutiny felt intrusive: “It always felt like such an intrusion on something very personal to me, something that I was figuring out in myself, something that I had yet to discover and still have yet to discover.”
Speaking about The Mountain, he said that the song holds special meaning because it’s his way of addressing these rumors in a way that felt “close to [his] heart.” Mendes added, “I’m just speaking freely now because I just wanna be able to be close to everyone and be in my truth. The real truth about my life and about my sexuality is that, man, I’m just figuring it out like everyone and I don’t really know sometimes, and I know other times.”
The crowd listened intently as he admitted that living in a society eager to dissect such a private part of his life is “really scary.” But he also expressed a profound courage, sharing, “I’m trying to be really brave and just allow myself to be a human and feel things. Yeah, that’s all I really wanna say about that for now.” His words were met with applause, a shared understanding perhaps of how difficult it can be to just be—especially when the world is watching.
Shawn’s journey, like anyone’s, isn’t a story for us to dictate or define. But his experience speaks volumes about the pressure public figures face. Mendes has addressed these rumors more times than he should ever have to, from a 2016 Snapchat response, where he commented, “The focus should be on the music and not my sexuality,” to a revealing interview with Rolling Stone in 2018, where he admitted the toll these rumors had taken on him.
At the heart of this is a larger issue: society’s fixation on categorizing people, expecting everyone to “fit” into a box. Mendes’ own reflections on this are painfully real. He described the distress of constantly re-evaluating his own mannerisms to avoid further rumors. And in a raw moment for The Guardian in 2020, he admitted that the desperation to see him “come out” was infuriating, particularly when he thought about people in the LGBTQ+ community who might be struggling to come to terms with their own identities, “It’s just completely ignorant and insensitive of people to be on that shit.”
This obsession with labeling isn’t just invasive—it’s profoundly damaging. Public figures like Mendes find themselves under a microscope, where every gesture, relationship, or even silence can be twisted to fit a narrative that society wants to impose. For many, this type of scrutiny feeds into a cycle of insecurity and self-doubt, forcing individuals to question even the most basic aspects of themselves. This is particularly harmful for those within the LGBTQ+ community, for whom coming out is often a deeply personal and complex journey. When this process is stripped of privacy, it turns what should be an empowering moment into one marked by pressure and fear.
And it’s not just celebrities who feel this pressure. From early on, people are often taught to identify and validate themselves based on external categories, rather than embracing the fluid and evolving nature of their identities. This culture of categorization can create lasting internal conflict, especially for individuals who are still exploring or questioning their sexuality. In a world where so many are striving for authenticity, we’re still grappling with an expectation to perform our identities in ways that are digestible and definable for others.
For Mendes—and for so many others—there’s a sense of isolation that comes from this scrutiny, a feeling that privacy is a luxury rather than a right. Mendes’ words last night highlight just how critical it is to approach questions of identity with respect, compassion, and, above all, patience. The path to self-understanding isn’t a single moment; it’s a journey that everyone deserves the time and space to experience fully, without outside pressure.
So to Shawn, wherever this journey takes you, we wish you the peace and privacy to follow it fully. Here’s to a future where authenticity is met with respect, free from assumptions, and where everyone is given the space to define themselves on their own terms.
Find Shawn Mendes’ full speech below:
Shawn Mendes’ new album, Shawn, will be out on November 15. Follow us on X and Instagram for all queer stuff!
Featured Image: Photo by Charlotte Rainville. Via the Clash.
